Last night was crazy... went to my cousin's house to join in a small get together with many more family members the I have not seen in close to 20 years!! Things got emotional... things got heated... then things ended in hugs and kisses! Isn't it funny how families are?
I drank a little much ... that has not happened in , hmmmm.... maybe 2-3 years! So, my need to hit the porcelain throne overwhelmed me! UCK! Don't think I will do that one again for a long time!
And the next paragraph....
Church! Sound funny moving from getting drunk to going to church sound hypocritical?????? I am not your "churchy" kind of girl... however, I have a ever growing, every loving relationship with my God so ... yes! I went to church this morning. Feeling not so well physically, I pushed myself to get dressed and get there anyhow.
I am so glad I did! You see... God knows me well! =) He has graciously and lovingly kept me safe and He loves me unconditionally. What a gift that is... in a world so cold at times. He has held my hand when Quinn (my husband) died 7 1/2 yrs ago. He has gone before me to keep me safe when I made stupid choices to use meth. He now walks with me and provides for me as I seek Him and pursue not only my continued education but as I learn to live Meth-FREE!! (Praise Him!! ) Do I feel like a "hypocrite"... no! I feel "REAL"!!!!
Real is admitting we are no where near perfect but we are trying to be better!
Real is understanding that we can not fix anything or anyone... Only God can!
Real is brave and open and honest! Who we are, what we have done, and what God is doing in our lives each and every day to bring us closer to Him so that He may shine through us!!
Pastor Travis (of my new church home, The Refuge) spoke today on the two things God wants us to do. REPENT and SURRENDER! As he spoke, I felt a stirring in my heart to give to the church the gifts and the talents God created in me! (could this be surrendering?) I have never "given" to the churches I have attended throughout my lifetime except my offerings. So this will be a journey and a blessing for me to begin! I'm so excited! I just had to share it with whoever might stumble upon this post!
What am I giving? ME! My time and a weekly bulletin. You see... I like to take notes, and God uses them at pre-planned dates and times when I will need them for a certain circumstance or challenge I might be facing. It's seems to be His way of reminding me of His word and His love! The Refuge does not currently have a weekly bulletin... so, after church this morning I offered my services (being purely amateur! LOL) to create and produce them each week. I have to give ALL the glory and honor to Christ as I leap out there with both feet ! I feel the peace of My God telling me to just follow and HE will give me the words to print and messages HE wants the readers to hear!
I left Church feeling alive and excited!! I couldn't have asked for more this morning!! =)
And finally... I got the opportunity to play "interior designer" for a friend the rest of the day! That ... is truly my other passion in life and one that I am currently in school for! I lay down this evening, a little sore from moving large furniture around and crawling up and down a chair to hang pictures and create a home for Heather to come home to everynight! My brain is a little tired from "creating" lol... thinking of "how would this look" ... "ok.. move this there, NOW how does it look?" ... "will she like it?" ... " am I reflecting HER style and not my own!!" (although mine is pretty Fantastic!! LOL) But my soul is at peace and so very content and happy!
Now THAT... Is a Crazy -- Fantastic Day!
No comments:
Post a Comment